Lindsay Lohan dropped a yuletide log bomb on her MySpace blog on Christmas Eve. Looks like the DNA paternity test results are back because she took to MySpace once again before the end of the year to rant. This time comparing herself to Britney Spears and confirming her dad had an illegitimate love child. Yeah thats right, turns out her dad Michael Lohan did fathered a child with a woman he was cheating on wife Dina Lohan with. No word if the girl is Ashley Kaufman from this summer's epic "Lohan Love Child" saga, but I hope so. Because that means that there are more of these people out there to keep the Gutter Uncensored going in the new year. Anyway, here's Lindsay bringing the "good" news:
i think that people go through a lot in life. and the things that we go through, whatever they may be, simply just make us stronger in the long run... that is, if we actually take what it is we have learned from our mistakes and teach ourselves what NOT to do in the future. i have gone through a lot in my past, and to be completely honest, i am still going through a lot right now.. my father just let my family and i know, amongst others that he had another child after my little sister Aliana, or maybe he had it before Aliana?? either way, he cheated on my mother and that really sucks... MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! wow- do i sound like "debbie downer" or what? not trying to be... but back to the real reason for this blog-i feel like Britney Spears is an amazing talent, and she has gone through a lot, (just as i have) in the public eye.. which is not necessarily a bad thing.. It teaches young girls and boys that there are certain things in life that you should not let get in the way of your dreams and accomplishments. also that you need to take care of yourself before anyone else, and i mean anyone and everyone else. because at the end of the day, you have to look at yourself in the mirror and see who you really are. stripped of all the distractions in life. so YAY Britney for just being you and still following through with your dreams. i know i am a bit late in writing about this record since it came out already, but better late than never!!!! :)
HAPPY HOLIDAYS AND MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!
Whoa, whoa, whoa. I know your dad's wandering penis just rained all over your Christmas, but that's no reason to compare yourself to Britney Spears. Try to see the glass as half-full. (Of gin, if necessary.) You only went to rehab once or twice. She had to hand over her kid to the fucking SWAT team. That's like trying to compare apples and oranges. But both are untalented yet achieved an unprecedented level of fame not through hard work and determination, but through being coked up 24/7 and flashing their vaginas. Congratulations Lindsay, you may be right.